I still get extremely uncomfortable sometimes about others sex lives. It’s not logical, but probably mental scarring that’s been mainly cleaned up but still lingers.
Time to be irrationally upset before going to bed.
I would sure love to get claw nails again someday but!!! I would scar myself again!! Ha ha fun!!!
Why do I love looking at blood so much then grow disgustingly uncomfortable afterwards mmmmnv 
Most things relating to child abuse make me extremely uncomfortable and have for a long time. I don’t quite understand if I was hurt or touched as a child or what, but it feels like a vague hidden memory is hidden in there somewhere. I can’t say when or where or how or if it even happened. Just feels like a slowly sinking trigger until I sink myself.
Sex was something I was just so against for a long time? Or porn. Or drugs or anything really. That might be unrelated but eh…
I’m a disgusting useless piece of shit. What else is new.
Ever since I was a kid I’d go through such bad snacking urges to the point it feels like withdrawal from a drug. Still have it today, sometimes more frequent than others. No wonder I’m overweight though. I can’t seem to stop eating sometimes.
I’ve been working out and working hard but food will be my biggest problem. Just gotta keep trying.
moroulia replied to your post: Took a double dose of antidepressants last night…
Does the prescription call for that sometimes?
No. But I did look at the dosages and it’s either 20 or 40. I was just so upset last night I needed it. Going to stay at 20 though.
Took a double dose of antidepressants last night so I just feel kind of numbed out. Like I feel that I would be far more upset otherwise.
It’s pretty much like any mental strength I’ve grown over the past many years has just vanished and I’m just a pathetic disgusting little shell that’s been crying for a good hour ah life is great
